Tuesday, February 4, 2014

REMEMBERING PHILIP SEYMOUR HOFFMAN AND THAT TIME HE BOUGHT ME DINNER (TRUE STORY)

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Yesterday the world lost a tremendous actor and a tremendous person.  I've always been a fan of his work, but when I met him in a crowded Chipotle a few years ago, I discovered what an amazing person he was, too.  That night, Philip Seymour Hoffman bought me dinner and taught me a few things about selflessness and helping others.  It will go down as one of the coolest and most inspirational nights of my life.  The night it happened, I wrote it all down.  Yesterday's news made me want to find what I had written and share it with you.  

The night started out like every other Friday night at Chipotle for us. until we got to the cash register.  As we got ready to pay, the cashier told us that it had already been taken care of.  We asked who had done it.  She said that she wasn't supposed to say and just told us that for the next 20 customers in line, their bills were paid for.  I quickly turned to look around the restaurant to see who it could be.  My eyes fell on the scruffy blonde man sitting in the middle of the restaurant with his kids.  He had been the first person in line when we got there.  
On our way to sit down, I stopped by this man’s table and said thank you.  He chuckled and said that it had been the kids’ idea.  I thanked them, too, adding that it was too generous and offered to pay him back.  He said that I probably did things like this for people all the time.  I smiled, but thought to myself “No, I really don’t”.  I left the table wondering, who does this? 
As I sat down at my table, I asked my husband if he thought that guy looked familiar.  The light seemed to click on in both of our heads at the same time.  He told me that I had to go back and ask him if it was true.  Wanting to preserve his anonymity, but not being able to live with myself without knowing, I walked back up to the stranger’s table.  
“I’m sorry to bother you again,” I started, “but you look really familiar.”  He chuckled, turned to his kids and said, “You hear that kids?  She thinks I look like Brad Pitt!”  I couldn't resist, so I whispered, “You’re Philip Seymour Hoffman, aren't you?”  He nodded, and I did my best to temper my excitement.  The rest of the conversation is a bit of a blur.  I think I said something about this being one of the greatest moments of my life (no offense to my husband). 
You’d think that Philip Seymour Hoffman buying me dinner would be the end of my story.  It’s not.  A few minutes after he left with his kids, a young man came up to our table.  He said that he hadn't eaten in a day and was hungry.  He wanted us to buy him dinner.  After living for a few years in a city, instinctively my husband and I both said no.  Sorry, but no.  The young man walked away, and my husband and I looked at each other.  We couldn't believe that moments ago we had been talking about what a nice thing a stranger had done for us, and now, confronted with the opportunity to pay it forward, we had failed miserably.  Lucky for us, the young man ended up walking back by us and my husband took him to the front and bought him dinner.  
Rarely does a teaching moment like this come full circle in such a short amount of time.  It's easy to become hardened and accept the generosity of others but forget that you should be giving that goodwill, too.  That night I was reminded of this very important life lesson, and I have Philip Seymour Hoffman to thank.

I don't want to make a comment on any of the factors surrounding his death.  I just wanted to share this really nice story.  

10 comments:

  1. Oh wow--the twist where just minutes later you had the opportunity to share the same generosity to someone else is quite amazing. What a memorable story.

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  2. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I don't want to read any sensational news stories -- bad or good -- about this man's death. I am saddened by the loss of amazing actor who, by all accounts, was also a nice guy. Let his family grieve, for goodness sake. I have had the opportunity to meet many 'celebrities' and I would much rather learn about them as people (it doesn't hurt when they are good people) than about their latest hookup or juice cleanse. He was a fabulous actor. And a generous person. And a good dad. And fallible. He was human. Just like the rest of us.

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    1. I totally agree. Thank you for the comment:)

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  3. He sounds like a lovely man. I'm a huge fan of his work, so very talented. So sad that he is gone. What a wonderful story you have to remember him by, thank you for sharing it Kari.

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  4. Love this story and memory you shared. Very sad to hear abou this death. He was one of the good ones.

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  5. This made me cry. Thank you for sharing this, Kari. It's always good to reminded of and inspired by the goodness in others. I really enjoyed reading this. What a special moment. I'm so sad he's gone.

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    1. I was just re-reading this to Scott. There's a movie with Philip Seymour Hoffman on tv right now, so I wanted to share your story. The part about you saying "I think I said something about this being one of the greatest moments of my life (no offense to my husband). " made me laugh twice now :)

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